--- title: "Ask the Professionals: The Benefits of Mediation for Children" --- [![Screen Shot 2018-10-17 at 11.47.20 AM](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Screen%20Shot%202018-10-17%20at%2011.47.20%20AM.png?width=575&name=Screen%20Shot%202018-10-17%20at%2011.47.20%20AM.png)](https://njmonthly.com/) Search this site on Google - - - - - [News](https://njmonthly.com/news/) - [Eat & Drink](https://njmonthly.com/eat-drink/) - [Things to Do](https://njmonthly.com/things-to-do-in-nj/) - [Top Doctors & Dentists](https://njmonthly.com/find-a-doctor/) - [Arts & Entertainment](https://njmonthly.com/arts-entertainment/) - [Shore & Travel](https://njmonthly.com/shore-and-travel/) - [Home & Style](https://njmonthly.com/home-style/) - [Subscribe](https://njmonthly.com/digital/) - [News & Features](http://njmonthly.com/) - [Best of Jersey](http://njmonthly.com/best-of-jersey/) - [Jersey Living](http://njmonthly.com/jersey-living/) - [Politics & Public Affairs](http://njmonthly.com/politics-public-affairs/) - [Steve Adubato: Only in NJ](http://njmonthly.com/category/towns-schools/steve-adubato-only-in-nj/) - [Historic Jersey](http://njmonthly.com/historic-jersey/) - [Plain Sight: A Jerseyan’s Photo Blog](http://njmonthly.com/category/plain-sight-a-jerseyans-photo-blog/) - [Books](http://njmonthly.com/books/) - [Eat & Drink](http://njmonthly.com/eat-drink/) - [Find a Restaurant](http://njmonthly.com/eat-drink/) - [Latest Reviews](http://njmonthly.wpengine.com/articles/restaurant-reviews/) - [Best Restaurants](http://njmonthly.com/articles/eat-drink/the-25-best-restaurants-2015/) - [Table Hopping with Rosie](http://njmonthly.com/category/eat-drink/table-hopping-with-rosie/) - [Soup to Nuts Blog](http://njmonthly.com/category/eat-drink/soup-to-nuts/) - [Arts & Events](http://njmonthly.com/arts-events/) - [Find an Event](http://njmonthly.com/arts-events/) - [Submit an Event](http://njmonthly.com/submit-an-event/) - [Culture Corner](http://njmonthly.com/culture-corner/) - [Towns & Schools](http://njmonthly.com/news-features/#) - [The Top Towns](http://njmonthly.com/articles/towns-schools/the-best-places-to-live-new-jersey-2015/) - [Best High Schools](http://njmonthly.wpengine.com/articles/towns-schools/education-2014-the-state-of-our-schools/) - [Top Dentists](http://njmonthly.com/find-a-dentist/) - [Top Doctors](http://njmonthly.com/find-a-doctor/) - [Your Health](http://njmonthly.com/health/) - [People](http://njmonthly.com/people/) - [NJM Q&A](http://njmonthly.com/category/jersey-living/njm-qa/) - [Giving Back](http://njmonthly.com/news-features/#) - [Social Datebook](http://njmonthly.com/category/social-datebook/) - [Upcoming Benefits](http://njmonthly.com/arts-events/?event_title=&event_type=benefits&sub_cat=&event_start_date=&event_end_date=&event_city=&event_location=#results) - [Seeds of Hope](http://njmonthly.com/articles/jersey-living/people/2015-seeds-of-hope-nomination-form/) - [Great Oak Awards](http://njmonthly.com/articles/jersey-living/10-winners-selected-at-great-oak-awards-dinner/) - [Shopping & Style](http://njmonthly.com/shopping/) - [Susan on Style Blog](http://njmonthly.com/category/style-shopping/susan-on-style/) - [Home & Garden](http://njmonthly.com/home-garden/) - [Shore & Travel](http://njmonthly.com/news-features/#) - [Jersey Shore](http://njmonthly.com/jersey-shore/) - [Getaways](http://njmonthly.com/getaways/) - [Where to Stay](http://njmonthly.com/where-to-stay/) - [Weddings](http://www.njbride.com/) [![Screen Shot 2018-10-17 at 11.47.20 AM](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Screen%20Shot%202018-10-17%20at%2011.47.20%20AM.png?width=575&name=Screen%20Shot%202018-10-17%20at%2011.47.20%20AM.png)](https://njmonthly.com/) ![AskProfNoBackgroundFeb19](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/TTN/AskProfNoBackgroundFeb19.png?width=290&name=AskProfNoBackgroundFeb19.png "AskProfNoBackgroundFeb19") # The Benefits of Mediation for children [![New call-to-action](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/1746707/d23617ba-16c6-45d8-90ac-900b577d7d09.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/1746707/d23617ba-16c6-45d8-90ac-900b577d7d09) ![1.png](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/TTN/1.png?width=800&name=1.png "1.png")   As much as you, as a parent, want to provide a stable, healthy, and happy home for your children, many times an unhappy marriage can have the exact opposite affect. When one parent, or both, believe that it is for the best that the marriage end, it is important that those same parents are aware of some of the dangers a contentious divorce can have on the livelihood of their children, as well as benefits that divorce mediation can have in terms of a family’s overall well-being. While divorce mediation will not work for every family, when it can, here are some of the reasons why you may want to choose mediation over traditional divorce litigation when it comes to protecting the best interests of your children, as well as the stability of the family unit as a whole. ## Why a Contentious Divorce Can Negatively Impact Your Children The more contentious a divorce, the more that its affects will be felt by the entire family. Not only will parents be embattled legally, it will be all but impossible to hide the anger and resentment a contentious divorce can cause parents to feel towards one another from their children.   Children of even extremely young ages are highly perceptive, and the best case scenario is that they will feel sad knowing their parents are in such disagreement, worst case scenario one parent or the other will try to influence a child’s feelings towards their other parent in an effort to secure a more favorable child custody agreement or simply just for spite.   In addition, contentious divorces are expensive. A family’s savings can disappear quickly between court motions and unnecessary legal fees, and the financial security your children enjoy can easily be put in jeopardy.   The bottom line is that a contentious divorce is never good for the children of the divorcing parents, and can have serious, long-term impacts on their happiness, their relationship with their parents, and their economic security. ## Why Divorce Mediation Can Be a Positive Experience for Your Children Beyond avoiding the many negative consequences discussed above, divorce mediation can actually even be a positive experience for your children.   In order for divorce mediation to work, the divorcing parents must honestly and openly communicate their feelings, thoughts, and needs moving forward with one another. This not only creates a healthy and positive experience for all involved, it can also provide an excellent example to your children of how people in conflict can resolve said conflicts through communication and compromise.   Additionally, considering that most divorce mediations only involve a single attorney, and are based upon compromise rather than fighting over every last advantage, the mediation process is often significantly less expensive than divorce litigation, leaving your family (and thus your children) in a much more secure financial position moving forward.   Finally, it may also be the case that your children are asked to speak with your divorce mediator, sometimes privately sometimes as a family, and these discussions can leave your children feeling much more informed, and secure in the knowledge that their own needs and concerns are being taken into account during the divorce process. [![Begin Your Conversation](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/1746707/5254097c-71aa-4f66-9ff2-58cb6b1ddd78.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/1746707/5254097c-71aa-4f66-9ff2-58cb6b1ddd78) ![Related Articles (1).png](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/Related%20Articles%20(1).png?width=1150&name=Related%20Articles%20(1).png "Related Articles (1).png") [![2.png](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/TTN/2.png?width=800&name=2.png "2.png")](https://promo.njmonthly.com/preparing-for-your-divorce-mediation) [Preparing for Your Divorce Mediation](https://promo.njmonthly.com/preparing-for-your-divorce-mediation) [![9.png](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/TTN/9.png?width=800&name=9.png "9.png")](https://promo.njmonthly.com/financial-benefits-of-divorce) [Financial Benefits of Divorce](https://promo.njmonthly.com/financial-benefits-of-divorce) [![11.png](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/TTN/11.png?width=800&name=11.png "11.png")](https://promo.njmonthly.com/children-in-mediation) [Children in Mediation](https://promo.njmonthly.com/children-in-mediation) [![4.png](https://promo.njmonthly.com/hs-fs/hubfs/TTN/4.png?width=800&name=4.png "4.png")](https://promo.njmonthly.com/preparing-for-a-divorce-financially) [Preparing for a Divorce Financially](https://promo.njmonthly.com/preparing-for-a-divorce-financially) [![Return to the Family Law Library](https://no-cache.hubspot.com/cta/default/1746707/b352c351-aece-4aa2-b387-ac61c3572313.png)](https://cta-redirect.hubspot.com/cta/redirect/1746707/b352c351-aece-4aa2-b387-ac61c3572313) **Disclaimer:** This website and information presented are for the purposes of legal marketing and general education. 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